Tanisha Chopra

You may laugh with them, enjoy the warmth, share food, and still feel a quiet tightness inside like a small worry waiting in the corner.

If this happens to you, it doesn’t mean you don’t love your family.

And it definitely doesn’t mean something is wrong with you.

It’s simply that home is a place where along with love, there are also stressors old patterns, familiar comments, past experiences, or expectations.

So sometimes you feel “at peace” only when you are away from home, not because you dislike anyone, but because you are temporarily away from the triggers.

We often confuse being away from stressors with actually being stress-free.

Let us analyse the psychological phenomenon used here:

Humans can hold two opposite emotions like happiness and tension simultaneously without either cancelling the other. This is a normal emotional state, not a conflict.

Your body prepares for a stress reaction before the stressor arrives, based purely on past patterns. This creates micro-tension even in safe situations.

Your inner emotional state doesn’t always match the outer environment. The environment may be loving, but your nervous system still remains slightly guarded.

Your body remembers past emotional experiences with people even when your conscious mind doesn't think about them, so old emotional patterns automatically reactivate.

You feel emotionally safe because of love and familiarity, yet psychologically threatened because of past stress cues. Both feelings coexist without contradiction.

Even when nothing stressful is happening, leftover tension from past interactions lingers in the background, influencing how you feel in the present moment.

Psyche happens

It is a different kind of attachment I feel I’ve discovered their stress feels like mine, their little successes feel like my own. Even after I’ve shared something with them, I keep thinking about how they’re doing, hoping I get to play even a small part in easing their struggles. There is a soft spark inside me that whispers I’m growing into someone capable and helpful.

This transition from being the small one to someone they look up to makes me feel so nice. Being with them feels personal, like their happiness matters to me as much as my own, and their struggles sit quietly in my heart until they overcome them.

But let's first analyse the psychological concepts in this:

1. Vicarious Joy: Feeling genuine happiness by witnessing someone else’s progress or achievements.

2. Kinship Care Motivation: A natural drive to protect and emotionally invest in younger or dependent members of our social circle.

3. Relational Self-Construal: Defining who you are based on the close relationships that shape your identity and purpose.

4. Prosocial Responsiveness: A spontaneous urge to respond to others’ needs with support, guidance or care.

5. Transition of Role Hierarchy: The psychological shift that occurs when a person moves from a dependent role to one where they are looked up to.

A couple of days ago, I was hit with a bunch of disappointments — things I had been expecting just didn’t happen, and I felt myself sinking into that gloomy, stuck feeling.

But then I caught myself thinking, life is unpredictable, full of setbacks and unplanned chaos, so why not flip the script and do something unplanned that could actually be fun?

I remembered how much I had been craving my favorite food, which is only available in Bhimtal, 250 kilometers away, and suddenly it felt like the perfect little adventure to chase.

Without overthinking or waiting for a perfect plan, I just decided to go — the spontaneity itself felt freeing, like I was taking control of at least one thing in the day.

The drive, the change of scenery, and the tiny thrill of doing something out of routine completely lifted my mood, and for the first time that day, I genuinely felt light and happy.

By the time I reached Bhimtal and finally had that food, I realized that this small, spontaneous decision had turned my rough day into something memorable and positive.

Looking back, I still remember the disappointments, but now they are paired with the joy of that little adventure, and it reminds me that even in chaos, I can create moments that make me feel alive.

But anyways, let's analyse the psychological terms in this:

1. Coping mechanism (distraction) – You shifted focus from negative events to a positive activity.

2. Behavioral activation – Taking action (the trip) helped break the cycle of rumination.

3. Emotion regulation – Changing environment and engaging in a rewarding activity boosted mood.

4. Positive reappraisal – You reframed your setbacks as a reason to try something new.

5. Resilience – You bounced back by actively creating positive experiences.

6. Reward-seeking behavior – Pursuing something enjoyable (your favorite food) increased motivation and happiness.

7. Memory reconsolidation – The memory of the bad day now includes a positive, uplifting experience.

She scrolls through reels and suddenly comes across a reel with the song 'Ehsaas'. She looks up for the song. And doesn't realise how it becomes the most played song for 2 days straight. However, there's a line in the song that she doesn't know why she's not very fond of. She notices it in the very beginning but chooses to ignore since the rest of the song was so good. After 3 days that line in particular starts annoying her to an extent that she stops listening to the song.&nbsp;

But did she not love the song? She did. Was the song not of the genre she likes? It was of the genre she loves.

She is me. Hi, I am Tanisha Chopra an average girl with not-so-average vision for things.

Similar, is the case with any sort of relations built by humans with anyone or anything. There are potential pitfalls we identify in the very beginning, however, fail to focus on them which gradually leads to discomfort arising. This may lead to complete loss of interest with actual love for the person or thing remaining intact.

1. Selective Attention – at first, you focus on the pleasant parts (song or partner) and downplay the irritating bits.

2. Attentional Bias – once you notice the irritating detail, your attention keeps drifting back to it.

3. Negativity Bias – the annoyance starts outweighing the positives, even if they’re bigger in number.

4. Sensitization – instead of adapting, you become more sensitive to that irritation over time.

5. Avoidance Behavior – the eventual solution is withdrawal: stop listening to the song / distance yourself in the relationship.

She is a social butterfly. She loves interacting with people but also knows how to maintain the gap between being friendly with people and not calling everyone her friend at the same time. But there comes a point after a long day when she does nothing but lay down, plug in her earphones, play slow songs, and her fingers dance on the screen while she plays Subway Surfers.&nbsp;

She faces the urge of repeating one consonant sound like that of 'R' any word with this sound would serve the purpose.&nbsp;

While Jake is being chased by the cop, collecting coins from the left lane sometimes makes it uncomfortable. And other times even while using the magnet it feels uneasy when coins come from the left lane. She tries but can't help it.

She is me. Hi, I am Tanisha Chopra an average girl with not-so-average vision for things.

But let's first analyse the psychological terms, we learn from this:

1. Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) – Repeating actions or thoughts to feel less anxious.

2. Symmetry/Ordering Compulsions – Feeling uneasy if things aren’t done “correctly” or in a certain order. (For example, collecting coins only from the left lane.)

3. Verbal/Vocal Compulsions – Feeling the need to say a word or sound to feel comfortable. (Like repeating the consonant “R.”)

4. Intrusive Thoughts – Unwanted thoughts that make you feel anxious.

5. Behavioral Compulsions – Actions you repeat to reduce discomfort or stress. (For example, playing the game in a specific way.)

6. Sensory Sensitivity – Feeling uneasy because of certain sights, sounds, or sensations. (Like coins appearing from the left lane.)

It was her first day at the court internship. A little girl who knew nothing had just watched Sherlock Holmes, knew murder mysteries were her favorite genre, and, above all, when three months ago her counsellor asked, "Where do you imagine yourself in 10 years?" she said without hesitation, "Walking in a dark corridor with my heels making a sound that scared everyone's @ss off, with my sleeves rolled, messy bun, and yes, yes, yes, yes it has to be a formal setting!" Unaware of the fact that it isn’t a movie.

She is me. Hi, I am Tanisha Chopra an average girl with not-so-average vision for things.

I felt, when my class 12th psychology teacher taught us Chapter 4 about psychological disorders, that I somewhat related with 8 out of the 12 disorders mentioned. But does that mean I actually have a disorder? No.

My teacher said, "Once you start studying disorders, you first think you have one, then maybe your family has one, and just after that, you think every damn individual has a disorder." So, anyway, I don’t consider this my fault since I’m just on stage one for now.

What psychological terms did we learn from this? Let's analyse:

1. Future-oriented imagination: Visualizing a dramatic career scenario shows planning and role-play.

2. Identification with media: Loving Sherlock Holmes reflects modeling behavior from admired characters.

3. Overgeneralization / self-diagnosis: Relating to multiple disorders illustrates common cognitive bias when learning about psychology.

4. Metacognition: Recognizing patterns without concluding a disorder shows self-awareness.

5. Intrinsic motivation / identity formation: Vivid future vision highlights goal-oriented thinking.

6. Humor as coping: Laughing at “everyone has a disorder” reflects cognitive reframing.

7. Openness to experience: Curiosity for murder mysteries and psychology shows creativity and imagination.

Penzo

Tanisha Chopra

Recent Blogs

Psyche happens

Psyche happens

Psyche happens

Recent Shorts

Recent Newsletters